Friday, 20 April 2007

Words from Jesus Christ

Jesus said on the cross while he was dying "Forgive them father, for they know not what they do" He also said that the whole world is lying in the power of the wicked one. These statements are possibly related to my experience and the experiences of Dr David Kelly, the Virginia Tech Shooter and many other victims throughout the world and through the strands of time. I do sometimes believe that some of the people whom abused me are not aware of the things they have done and therefore genuinely believe I am ill. Other people however ARE aware and I know Justin was one of them. Maybe that's why he is now dead. I still believe Wayne was the ring leader in the attack against me, he's been beaten up a few times but still no fitting punishment for what he caused me to go through. In that same circle of friends was a girl named Heather Sanders. Just a few weeks after the attack had begun on me, she was found dead. She had hung herself. Although I have no proof, I am 100% certain they did the same thing to her as they did to me. You see THATS WHAT MOST PEOPLE DO, they kill themselves cos they can't handle the abuse, which leaves very few people to tell the story. There are sickening abuses of weak people happening all over the world and it is covered up so future victims are not even aware of what is about to happen to them. It makes so angry, they are like Lambs to the slaughter. Next time you hear the story of a suicide keep an open mind. You may hear, oh he/she broke up with his/her partner or oh, his/her company went bust or, oh, he/she was using drugs. Some of those may be the reasons in a few cases but what you have to realize is these bastards attack you when you are at your weakest. They are COWARDS!!!

Thursday, 19 April 2007


"You have vandalised my heart, raped my soul and tortured my conscience" Is a phrase taken from the video by Cho Seung-Hui. (see post below) That my friends is a PERFECT description of what has happened to me also. I do not condone the shootings, but I can confirm that during my early years all I wanted to do was kill the people that abused me too, but I'm no murderer and never will be. However, the intensity of what (the type of people I've described to you in earlier posts) they do to you is so sadistic and cruel that I can understand some people taking Justice into thier own hands. I don't believe for one minute that Cho-Seung-Hui was mentally ill like the media is trying to have us believe. I BELIEVE HE TOOK REVENGE ON THOSE WHO ABUSED HIM. I can confirm, that if all 32 Victims are the type of people I've met in my life, the type that abuse the weak and show no mercy, then they deserved to die. Only it should be God who makes the final Judgement and not the victim. Just like Justin (mentioned in ealier posts) He was one of those that did most damage to me, but now he is dead and not at my hand. I believe God made the judgement and took Justins life. I don't know what will happen in the afterlife for Cho Seung-Hui but if he was abused the same way as me then I hope he is forgiven.


By Andrea Hopkins Reuters - Thursday, April 19
BLACKSBURG, Virginia (Reuters) - Students expressed disgust and disbelief at photos and a rage-filled video diatribe sent to a television network by the gunman who massacred 32 people at Virginia Tech university.
Half-a-dozen Virginia Tech students gathered silently around a bank of televisions in the student centre late on Wednesday watching images of Cho Seung-Hui posing with his guns and video of him ranting against rich kids and debauchery.
The package received by NBC News on Wednesday carried a postmark showing Cho mailed his rambling manifesto after he killed his first two victims on Monday morning but before he went on to cut down 30 more people in classrooms.
"That's crazy. He kills two people and then goes to the post office and then he's ready for round two? It's creepy," said graduate student Nick Jeremiah, 34.
The images and long monologue suffused with paranoia and feelings of persecution painted a different picture of Cho, a 23-year-old student who has been described by teachers and other students as silent and withdrawn.
"He just goes on and on -- that's got to be more than he's spoken, ever," Jeremiah said. "I thought, 'well, he does talk.'"
Devin Cornwall, 19, who watched the video in a dormitory room with two friends, said the gunman's hatred for rich children made no sense.
"To me, that doesn't personify any Tech student I know. I always think of us as a blue-collar place," Cornwall said.
In the video and an 1,800-word document, Cho railed against wealth and debauchery, portrayed himself as a defender of the weak and voiced admiration for the 1999 Columbine High School massacre.
"You have vandalised my heart, raped my soul and tortured my conscience," said Cho, speaking directly to the camera and occasionally looking down to read his message.
"You thought it was a pathetic boy's life you were extinguishing. Thanks to you I die like Jesus Christ, to inspire generations of the weak and the defenceless people."
The messages added to an already chilling portrait of Cho from roommates and teachers who described him as a disturbed loner. Cho had been accused of stalking female students and was taken to a psychiatric hospital in 2005 because of worries he was suicidal. A Virginia court order issued at the time declared him "mentally ill" and said he presented "an imminent danger to self or others," ABC News reported.
The shooting has rekindled debate over U.S. gun laws, the most lenient in the Western world. News of Cho's past contacts with police and mental health specialists raised further questions over whether anyone could have picked up warning signs.
University officials and police have been criticised for taking too long to alert students to the danger after Cho killed his first two victims in a dormitory just after 7 a.m.
CNN quoted from a search warrant affidavit on Wednesday that showed police suspected a different man of the first murders. The network said police had been told by a student that the boyfriend of murdered Emily Hilscher had recently taken her to a shooting range, and assumed he was the main suspect. They were interviewing him outside the campus when Cho began his classroom rampage.
On the sprawling rural campus in southwestern Virginia, students were beginning to look ahead to Monday, when classes will resume.
"It's going to be weird being back in class. We're still going to feel uneasy in big lecture halls, or crossing the drill field," said industrial design student Phil Padilla, 20.

Saturday, 7 April 2007


There are 2 Documentaries that you cannot buy in the Shops, Online or anywhere and you'll never see them broadcast on any of your TV Networks, BUT you can download them free. They are called :-

911 - The Great Conspiracy: The 911 News Special You Never Saw (2004)
Loose Change

They will show you just how evil and corrupt 'the powers that be' are in this world.

The facts shown about how 911 was an inside Job will shock you, you will see the Hypocrisy of Bush AND his father. You will see how the American Government manipulates events to suit it's own agenda. Sadly the UK is following in the footsteps of the USA as we saw with the Iraq Dossier. Without diverting too far from the 911 topic, I'd just like to explain about the Iraq dossier. The british Government claimed that Iraq had weapons of mass destruction and that they were to be about to be launced in 15 minutes or something stupid like that. THIS IS THEIR EXCUSE FOR INVADING IRAQ. Scandalous! The fall guy for the Iraq dossier is now dead, he took his own life as mentioned in a couple of other posts I have written. Anyway, back to the 2 recommended documentaries. If you don't yet know how to download from the internet then please follow these instructions.

1. First of all, please go to this link here you can download what is known as a bit torrent client, you will use this to download the programmes I have recommended.

2. After Installing the bit torrent client, please go to the following link and in the search box type in the above 2 titles ONE AT A TIME and search.

3. You will recieve a list of results, select the ones with most SEEDS and click the link

4. Select DOWNLOAD TORRENT then when the download box pops up select OPEN

You MUST have the bit torrent client running for the files to download. Download time varies on number of seeds, leechers and internet connection speed.

Please download these files, I promise you that you will not regret it!

Friday, 6 April 2007

Satans Tool - The media

I have no doubt whatsoever that evil has control of the media. TV and Radio. All the movies these days are full of Violence, Adultery, Lying, Rape, Murder, Hatred and all the other bad things you can think of. Fair enough, there is the odd 'feel good' film where all the bad stuff is toned down and the film has a moral story, but the majority of movies are full of corruption. The Radio is full of music with Lyrics used (as I believe) to abuse the mentally ill. Yes, the media is an effective tool for the evil of the world to attack and abuse it's enemies. Many a mentally ill person will tell you they recieve messages from the TV and Radio, and before it happened to me, if anyone told me about that I'd have thought them crazy. However, although it's not happening to me anymore I recently made a discovery that has really interested me. Have you ever noticed when you're watching the TV or listening to the radio you are sometimes distracted, or your concentration wanders and the TV could start talking in chinese for all we know???? Well that's when they forward an attack. I have started becoming inreasingly aware of these events recently. My concentration wanders but I often hear words out of context being said on the TV and Radio. NOT directed at me, but clearly at someone else who is going through what I have already endured. I was recently watching a football match and one of those moments came where my concentration was diverted away from the tv and I began going deep in thought when I BARELY heard the commentator say out of context 'JUST SIT DOWN FOR GOD SAKE' He definitely said it but usually I wouldn't have noticed. I was once told by my enemy (I won't say how) "we put in as much effort in protecting people as we do in revealing ourselves to them" My interpretation of that was THEY PUT AS MUCH EFFORT INTO DECIEVING PEOPLE AS THEY DO INTO ABUSING THEM. Our awareness is at a minimum and it is the enemy that runs the show. I will do another post soon for those who have already had a meeting with the enemy to reveal tricks they use in keeping you confused, I will reveal some of their abilities and give advice on how to fight back.

About the Ads on my blog......

I have only added advertisements to companies that I have found useful myself. The adsense however, is supposed to give adverts relevant to my postings but I must be doing something wrong. I will look into this. The link is my own add on, I recieve NO revenue if you click that link. I just added that so that any lonely readers may get a free membership to a dating site. It is possible for you to find that special someone there, as that's where I met my girlfriend.

Thursday, 5 April 2007


During my recovery, about 4 Years ago. I was in the city of Sunderland. I was out with my brother and some of his friends at a night club. It was a really strange experience, as the music being played was not chart music or any recognizable band music. It was unique music that I hadn't heard before and I haven't heard since. The lyrics were out of this world and applied to me and my condition as though they were made specially for me. I know what you must be thinking here "Yeah sure, Crazy person" but NO you're wrong, let me finish my story. The music WAS meant for me, and I knew it. I was smiling, feeling really cool. It made me feel special. However, when leaving the night club and Sunderland, I felt concerned that if it was the Devil (Who according to the Jehova Witnesses, Controls the music and media) and he was trying to be my friend. Then I must be doing something wrong. On the train out of sunderland I looked out of the window and saw a big banner on the back of a farm shed. It read "HAVE FAITH IN GOD". Anyway I got back home and went straight to my usual ways HATING what I believed to be SATAN AND HIS PEOPLE. I had the radio on and began ranting and raving with my usual complaints, when the radio DJ said 'totally out of context' "We've been getting along recently, SO DON'T START". That was a scary experience. It says in the Apocalypse, that satan SEDUCES the whole world. Well i'll tell you now, if I hadn't seen that 'Have faith in God' Banner at the time I did, I could have crossed over to the enemy, and I'm not kidding. Those were difficult times but I survived to tell the TRUTH about these events.

I have added some text to the very bottom of this blog, including some interesting facts about Doctor David Kelly. The signs showed that he had a brief encounter with the enemy, but sadly took his own life...... Or did he? Very sad loss either way, for a man who was just preaching the truth about how our government LIED about the Iraq weapons of mass destruction.

Tuesday, 3 April 2007

Next post to come

In my next post I will give a brief account of what has happened to me in the last 9 years since the alleged breakdown. I have suffered a lot and still do to this day. Infact I guess I should break the story down into smaller posts, as there are some other weird things that have happened to me that deserve a whole post to explain. I will get onto the illuminati and new world order topics after I have finished posting about my experience. I'd just like to tell you, that before my eyes were opened in 1998 I believed EVERYONE was the same. (Just a human Being trying to make the best of things) But that is simply not true. There is a dominating evil in the world today and unlike how the leading illuminati theorists say that a small amount of people are involved. I beg to differ, I would say it's more like 7/10 people involved. The problem is they are wolves dressed as sheep (Hypocrites) and they only reveal themselves when their prey is weak. They are also cowards NEVER admitting to what they do. However, their silence is an effective weapon in keeping me confused. My best weapon is faith as it comforts me in difficult times. I will search for the truth for as long as it takes, and you can be assured if I discover the reality of what is happening on earth nowadays, you will find it posted here.

About the free live football

I will be creating a whole seperate blog with regards to the free football. I want to keep this blog about mental illness, the new world order and illuminati. Please come back for details of the new blog which I will add at a later date.

Sunday, 1 April 2007

The 'GAME'

On the night that I described myself as being as high as almost God himself (again, I don't mean on drugs), I was in the house I shared with the drug dealer and what ended up as ten other men. When everyone was settled it was like my Consciousness rose a level. I noticed everyone talking in a different way. There were TWO interpretations to every sentence, an Innocent meaning and an advanced meaning. Unfortunately all the advanced meanings were being directed at me. This is very hard to explain so i'll try and give you an example. Lets say you and a friend are both sat at a computer now by a keyboard. If you look at the keyboard the letters U and I are located next to each other. You could say to your friend "Look U and I are right next to each other" well the innocent meaning to that statement would sound a little strange but the advanced meaning that I'm trying to explain would read out like "Look YOU and I are right next to eachother" meaning you and your friend who are both standing by the keyboard are actually right next to each other. So the statement has TWO meanings. Well it was like a major battle, very exciting and something I will never forget. Unfortunately I have forgotten most of the phrases that were used that night 9 years ago in 1998, but an example is WARDY who came to the house last challenged me to a game of chess. Bear in mind I had already been battling 9 lads with double meaning phrases for a good hour. As the game of chess continued he said "It batters your head after a while doesn't it" Now if I had been in a normal state of mind I would have thought he was talking about the game of chess, but as I had become more aware I knew he or it (whatever was controlling him) was talking about the game of double meaning phrases I had been participating in. Late on in the game one lad said "come on lads, fair play, he's done well" Well it could have seemed he was talking about the guy who was currently playing the playstation, but NO he was referring to me. All communication was indirect. There was only one bit of communication all night that was said directly to me, that came from JUSTIN who told me I was going to get myself killed. However, like I said in my first post. Justin is now dead, he got himself killed not me.

Vengeance belongs to God

I have prayed for death many a night due to what that crowd has done to me. Nobody seems to acknowledge the stories I have told as truth. I didn't deserve this fate and God knows that. I was actually partially warned about what could happen to me. In my teenage years a radio warning was broadcasted over and over again. "DON'T GET INVOLVED WITH CROWDS THAT USE DRUGS, THEY ARE NOT YOUR FRIENDS, THEY DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU" If only I had listened.

Brenda and the flowers dream

Upon waking on the morning I was to find out my Grandfather had died (My favourite relative) I remembered a vivid dream. In the dream I was having sex with a girl who was on top of me. I couldn't see who the girl was as she appeared as a silhouette. The dream then progressed outside the window of the room where I had a feeling of bliss, outside were hundreds of bluebell flowers, a garden full of them. Again the dream progressed where I was standing at the bottom of a stairway. At the top of the stairs was a door which opened and there was a very bright light, A man who was dressed in a robe walked out and said the words "Be succesful". Now I never told anyone about this dream, but as I had developed an interest in interpretating them and had a feeling it was a premonition. I was curious as to who the girl could be. There were a few girls I knew at the time but only one who fit the profile BRENDA. A few months later I was in the city of Bangor, Wales. At Brenda's house, there came a time when we were alone together. After 15 minutes or so of small talk, she pointed at a flower on a shelf and asked "have you ever seen one of those?" Sure enough, It was a blue bell. I was quick to think of the dream and gave a slight reaction of recogntion, Brenda then burst out laughing. I was quick to persume that she had shared the same dream as me. I was scared off by those events, but for about 7 years following what had happened there I believed Brenda was the girl for me but something had gone wrong. I no longer believe that now, as I have met the right girl for me and I believe Brenda to be just part of the evil attack that I was subjected to beginning in 1998. As far as I'm concerned she used the same ability as described in my first post about the lads to fool my innocence. I guess I was just a toy for her to play with, I probably helped humour her for an hour and gave her a bit of fun. A bit of fun that had the lasting duration of SEVEN YEARS for me.